I am always amazed at how time flies.....

WOW! It has been awhile since I've written anything that isn't about Credit Unions, isn't a thank you card (which I am not very good at all about doing) or a grocery list....I am welcoming myself back to the wonderful world of blogging; and, if I'm lucky, you will welcome me back too - if not - oh well....I'm still gonna do my thing!

Since I went missing back in August, we have completed our kitchen (love it), my husband made it through an entire NFL season WITHOUT fantasy football, but nonetheless $600 poorer (thanks New England & Wes Walker), Jayden my 5 year old, started kindergarten and Brodie turned 2 (she'll tell you she is 4). Life is ok. No ranting necessary. I might need to change the title of this blog....

Okay, so I am not changing the title -- end of discussion. If you know me, you know I ALWAYS have something to rant about.  I am a "wanna be" New York Jewish martyr - we always have something to bitch about. FYI - I say "wanna be" with the utmost respect. My mother is a New York Jewish martyr - non practicing, has never practiced and in fact was raised Methodist (or Protestant) - but her heritage is Jewish and she is a New Yorker - so close enough for these purposes.....

Funny story on a not so funny topic. When I was pregnant with Jayden my husband and I were told we were both carriers of the gene that could cause our child to have Tay-Sachs, a horrible disease. A child can only get Tay-Sachs by inheriting it. The genetic trait is relatively common among certain ethnic groups, such as Ashkenazi Jews. When I told my mother this she said, and I quote "But we don't even celebrate." She meant Jewish holidays; and I will take this moment to say I think she was shell shocked that we were carriers and she is NOT a dumb woman.

By the way, if you read this and run into my mother, mums the word that I just described her that way and used that example. Anyway (sigh)....moving on now....

Maybe I should change this blog to "Funny Stories from a Ridiculous Family"  - I do have many and my family can easily be label ridiculous....

So you wanna hear one more?

During remodeling (which has been a two year process), my husband was up in the attic while I was at work relaying insulation -before I finish the story, please put anything you are drinking down....

Did you put it down? Are you ready for this one?

He calls me and says,"I found a bunch of s&*t in the attic do you want it?"
Me: "What kind of s*%t?" 
Him: "Some Christmas ornaments, a box of other decorations and a painting."
Me:  A painting? hmmmmm....."what kind of painting?"  
Him: "I don't know it is a painting of some dude with a bunch of guys"
Me: A dude with a bunch of guys????? So I ask, "Are they at a long table with food on it?"
Him: "Yes"
Me: "Are you serious? That is the Last Supper." thump (that was me falling off my chair when I realized I married a man with no clue)

Seriously, who besides my husband does not know that painting? Even if you are not religious at all you should know that painting.

And that my friends, is all for now.

Pure Amazement....

Okay, if you know me at all you know I love a good husband bashing. During these rants I am not really anti my husband but more letting off steam, unleashing frustration with a little humor at the expense of my husband.

I will say this once and only once (maybe). I do tend to repeat myself, and since a few years ago when my husband informed me that he only retains 30% of what I say, I tend to repeat myself at least 3 times with the hopes of someone hearing me.

My husband, Jason, is AMAZING! Yes I said that out loud.

And not in a room alone.

And not with my slightly nasally, New York accented voice laden with sarcasm. I make that comment to you dear reader with the utmost sincerity.

So what did my husband no to deserve this praise? He completely demolished our kitchen himself. In one weekend. With no complaints. "None?" you ask. None. Not a word, not a yell, not an aggravated tone. Nothing. Rien. Nada. Zilch. Zero. A good start to our in-house remodeling efforts I'd say.

He has a game plan. Electrical tonight, insulation this week, sheet rocking next weekend and so on. Hopefully, in 3 or 4 weekends we'll have a brand spanking new kitchen!

Can I order take out to celebrate? 
Audra