So now what....

Next week I will be sitting on Ellen's couch. We will be laughing about the stories I am sharing with her about the days when I had a "real job". We'll talk about where I pull my daily inspirations from, my background, my family, where I grew etc. She might even surprise me with a visit from Kid Rock!

Okay, so this obviously isn't really happening - but I can see it now.

It has been almost 2 weeks since I started this blog and in my head it has taken on its own life. It is powerful. I have a huge following. I have branched into a stand up routine and promotional items. Megaphones, pill boxes and more. I endorse many pharmaceutical items including (but not limited to) Zoloft, Xanax, Lexapro and other medications to keep me and others like me sane. I have a website. I have a brand. I have a logo.

Seriously, now what? Can I run with this? Can I make it into something that I could do full time? I am an extremist. It is all or nothing for me and has been my whole life. There has never been a halfway point for me - there is no middle ground. So right now I am in the midst of typing away frantically (otherwise it would be considered half ass and that isn't me). For 2 weeks I have been writing. I find it very therapeutic. It is nice that people are reading it, sharing it - but I would enjoy doing it regardless.

I tend to become obsessive with new things - I am full speed ahead, no holds barred, for 2 weeks, maybe a month and then it happens.I stop. It just ends - one day I wake up and just stop doing that thing, whatever it may have been.

I need there to be a goal, a purpose, a point where I can say "okay I did it". I like stressful goals that seem overwhelming. I like stress I think. I seem to search it out, create it. I like to take on several things at once, my timing is always bad. I am usually in the middle of one project and starting another at the same time. I always have an errand that needs to be done, a return to be made. It is never ending and, as I said before, I think self initiated. It gives me something to rant about and you, if you choose, something to read about.

Until tomorrow...

Audra